I'm a programmer with a massive capacity for abstraction. My favorite area in programming is architecture. But I see beyond that. I can perceive how every structure in a codebase has a symbolic and spiritual meaning. It's a vision of how a user feels in that digital space, and what we can do to foster a real relationship with that user. It’s similar to what UX folks do, but I come at it from a more intuitive, holistic angle. And because I think that to have a broad vision of a project I need to get down to the operational side and get my boots dirty. The word that fits best is spiritual because it implies this world beyond appearances. And that’s the world we live in. When we interact with a site, its structure resonates with our minds in mysterious ways. A system isn’t just a system, it has living interactions, its own rituals and associations that go far beyond cold rationality.
When I enter a company and begin to interact with its codebase, I don’t approach it like a sewer worker just fixing a pipe and leaving. I go in with all my gear. I analyze every structure. I sense what’s solid, what needs maintenance, what’s built on shaky foundations. That’s why I often take longer. Sometimes I don’t write a single line of code, because just grasping the architecture was overwhelming enough for my mind.
Trying to justify this way of working has rarely worked, except once, when I had a cool leader who gave me full freedom. I once went a whole week without delivering anything… but I also built an entire MVP using unfamiliar technologies in just three days. That’s the fluid nature of my productivity, which has made it hard for me to fit into most other environments.
I can’t do anything without understanding it holistically.
So the real value of my work, especially in large codebases, only reveals itself in the long run. Of course, that doesn’t mean I’m lazy. I tend to work harder than is healthy (something I’m actively working on), but my process isn’t easy to justify when the only criteria are quantitative.
"So if I hire you, will you be a highly productive developer in the long term?" Probably not. Because today, I’m not chasing hyper-productivity. I could be, I have been at times, but I’ve regretted it. I know I can only contribute meaningfully over time if that contribution respects a healthy life-work balance.
Now, someone with a more quantitative, Cartesian mindset might think: “This sounds like a bad deal. Why hire someone slower, whose value only shows up years down the line, especially if I won’t be around to see it?”
That’s why the right person for me to work with is someone leading a more personal project. A project deeply tied to their connection with the Self. But of course, if you work at a corporation and have space to bring someone like me on board, I’d be open to that too. It’s not about the project itself (as long as it’s not something evil, obviously), it’s about the kind of environment where this way of working is possible.
Okay, fine, here’s a material advantage for materialist minds: I’m very affordable. Living in Brazil with a very simple lifestyle, $15K a year would already be convincing.
I have 4 years of experience. I’m a decent Ruby on Rails developer, but I’ve also been branching out, and honestly, the tech stack doesn’t matter much to me. I learn quickly, because I’ve truly learned programming, not just a framework.
I’m a sane person (despite this post), light-hearted, simple, and even kind of fun. My favorite life philosophy is Taoism: compassion, moderation, and humility.
If this crazy message resonates with you, feel free to reach out at afiado-tabulado-9x@icloud.com
mergy•3h ago
Honestly, you might not be able to work for someone or something else. It's going to be hard for others to meet the levels it seems you detail in order for you to contribute and feel fulfilled. It reads like a very high bar or level to have to hit to unlock your commitment and efforts.
Be careful and aware many others might not want to take that on in the hope that they may achieve your needs. They may not want to even try.
I wish you well on your journey. This is your journey to walk.