a way to find people is to pursue your natural interests and let “the project” become its own thing organically

https://www.meetup.com/ Search for people in your area with a group who are doing what you are looking for help with.

Welcome to the club, I suppose.

I am eternal optimist, but pragmatic as well. I have tried many avenues and have varying amounts of hits and misses over the decades.

I realize it is geography, luck, happenstance (and other factors) for most part in finding a co-founder.

I also realize a shared experience or pain is pivotal in finding and keeping a co-founder.

MeetUps and CoFounder Dating and other sites are good, but hard to find the ying for your yang (for lack of a better term) by just talking to some random person at a random meetup. It is not impossible, of course.

So no answers here and I haven’t found any myself - yet!

I've gone with people I've known (friends, basically) rather than finding partners at meetups etc. I know I'm lucky in my choice of friends. This worked really well one time and not so well another.

Case 1: I started Fiat Lux with my friend Nick, who I met in college. We worked together on it for eight years. He was fully committed and put in just as much work as I did. Even when things were tough and not working well, I knew I could count on him, and he stayed to the end.

Case 2: For a superresolution radio app I recruited a small team of friends who I had worked alongside before for years. I knew they were all great people and very competent. For the first year or so it went well, but when we didn't get any momentum going, life got in the way and most of the team found other things more important. In the end I was the only one still working on it and we dissolved the partnership.

The differences between those cases, as I understand them:

1) Younger vs middle aged - family responsibilities get in the way

2) Prior interest - I think Nick would have worked on fusion if any opportunity had come his way, while my later team wasn't nearly as interested in superresolution as I was

3) Unequal previous time investment - when I brought Nick in, it was still pretty early in the project, so it was a journey together. But when I recruited the team, I already had a patent, basic code and years of work done, and I think this left them with less of a feeling of shared ownership.

4) Team dynamic - with the team, when one person was excited, it got everyone excited, but when one person was discouraged, it made everyone else discouraged. Managing this dynamic was difficult and distracted from the work. With just me and Nick things were simpler.