Please don't think you are not good enough. The interviewing process is just ridiculous and illogical (for an industry that deals with logic all the time!).

I don't have any answers - since I am also in the current state. And I also found out that no one has any answers - everyone is probably lost in some way or another.

Take some time off if you can. And if you have the luxury, don't think about anything else for a while.

If I was starting today, rather than an electrical engineering degree, I'd choose a trade: probably electrician, or plumber.

I know a few kids working for themselves in these trades and they are in unceasing demand.

1. Get a job that pays the bills for starters, doesn't have to be fancy or pay much, just enough that you don't become homeless.

2. Do something in your spare time that you're interested, just for fun, with no expectations or even plans of making money from it.

3. You will profit in a way you couldn't possibly plan or predict. Or maybe not. But probably. Either way, you're not homeless or starving.

If you've founded multiple companies previously, can you reach out to your network and see if there's a former client / colleague you could help with consulting or contract work, using your skills and some of your existing domain specific knowledge?

Formal collaboration depends on a culture that's more or less dead now. I wouldn't bet my future on it getting sorted out.

Some of those who are very successful are truly talented and deserve everything they got; but some were just lucky. It's not blind luck like winning the lottery, but rather being at the right place at the right time.

You may have much more talent than you give yourself credit for.

You could go into management.

You could do SW work in a non-technical field. Manufacturing is making a resurgence.

I think if you go and get a "normal" job like being an electrician you'd be in for a shock about the level of work and relatively low pay compared to programming.

On the other hand, I wouldn't keep doing it if you hate it.

My luck is that there's still a lot that interests me in tech, like datalakes, data intensive systems, OTP and webdev with elixir and phoenix, compilers and micro vms...

For me it's an easy answer, I can use tech to finance my true purpose. I'm also lucky enough to live in a country where 66k USD affords me a very comfortable life.

For you there seems to be something more fundamental missing. You seem to be in the start of a journey inwards to understand what's your purpose, what could fill the Ikigai for you.

If you have money, take a break, travel, go meet people, broad your possibilities. The world isn't just SWE, specially silicon valley cutthroat morally-bankrupt SWE. If you immerse yourself in the world out there there'll be no guarantee you'll find what you want and there is a good chance you'll suffer, but it's likely you'll find something, and that I think makes it all worth it.

I don't work on glamorous projects; most of what I make will never be seen outside of my company, even. But I've got a child, got to move back to the rural town I was born in after I inherited my late grandfather's house (since I've been WFH my 12+ years), and I can genuinely say I enjoy my work most days.

If it's the actual job you hated I'd tell you to go back to school for something else or get into a trade, but it sounds more like you're just tired of the culture surrounding the startup and big tech scene. Go find work from companies that aren't "tech companies", you're less likely to run into leetcode interviews, shitty work/life balance, and the constant fear of your employer folding any morning.

Huh? Power to you, and that is awful behavior, but this sounds strange. Why let one person decide your career for you?

My experience is very different than yours. I've never worked for a proper tech company, nor a startup. I haven't been asked a ton of questions about how I engage with software outside of work in interviews, and none of my live coding interviews have been leetcode or memorization.

For me SWE is a nice stable pleasant 9-5 job, not the best job I've had, not the worst, but unquestionably the biggest responsibility-to-income ratio i can possibly imagine. I do mostly pleasant and unstressful work 40 hours a week and have enough money to do most anything i want. $140k goes a looooong way here in Chicago.

I think the burnout you're feeling is probably more tied to SF/big tech/startup culture than it is SWE as a career. I mean don't get me wrong I'm not certain i see myself being happy doing this forever either, but my "doing tech at non-tech or tech adjacent companies" experience sounds so drastically different than yours that i think you should give it a shot before completely changing careers. I can't speak to SF but i do at least see lots of these kinds of jobs out of New York when I'm browsing job listings. Chicago has lots of these kinds of jobs in theory but the market isn't great this second (though it probably isn't anywhere, is it?). Other major cities like Philadelphia, Seattle, hell even LA would save you money over SF and NY if that's a concern.

30 is still really young. Plenty of time to figure out how you want to live still. Clout and money don't really mean much but living comfortably with time and capital to do things you like, do.

No, you got paid in vibes.

Never. Accept. Vibes.

Vibes are for losers. Refuse to be treated like a loser.

Reject vibes; demand money.

It is always a mistake to do un-paid work for an organization that wants turn a profit from your work. They will always suck you dry, as if you are a fire hydrant and they are a blackhole.

> Planning on letting him know I'm out near the end of this week.

Stand up for yourself. Stop working immediately and tell them that you won't work for free any more. If they want further work, they should start paying immediately. And consider demanding they pay for work already done.

Your time is valuable; you can't get any of it back. Only genuinely charitable organizations and in-need individuals should ever get free work; everyone else must pay for work.

> Co-founder didn't understand why I wasn't interested working without salary anymore.

This is methhead logic on his part. Again, reject vibes; demand money. Methheads live on vibes, especially the vibes from stimulants.

> most of my friends make way more money than me or have families

Again, reject vibes. You see their vibes, but are you so sure that they are actually doing well overall? They could be in debt up to their eye-balls; they could have terrible family situations; they could be totally burned-out from working 80-hour weeks. A lot of people put out good vibes to try to make themselves feel better about a bad situation; vibes can't fix a broken home, a terrible job, or a bad financial decisions.

A lot of people have started families/careers later in life. Now is the time to figure out why you want money/family/whatever. Working to feed your family is rewarding; working just to work is self-harm. Starting a family in order to shower them with love is rewarding; starting a family because it's a milestone is egotistical.

> Anyone else pivot away from tech and still make half-decent income?

Reject vibes; find a boring job. Research the sort of jobs that nobody wants to work, but which pay well. Those jobe have no vibes to offer, so they attract few candidates. A SWE can find good work doing boring jobs, because SWEs focus on details; and details are the antidote to vibes.