Note - I had AI help me turn my billion-page story to a reasonable length.
I understand I was naive in this, but I was trying so hard to do my best work that I didn’t look at the whole situation objectively. That’s on me.
The truth is, no calculator or startup blog can account for all the variables in a situation like this — execution, risk, emotional labor, trust, money, time. So I’m turning to the real-world experience of people here. Appreciate any thoughts.
I spent 7+ months as the technical co-founder on a startup. I built everything — backend, frontend, auth, UI/UX, integrations, hosting. There was no product before I joined, just an 8-year-old idea (yes, I know) and some outdated PDFs (just designs). I also paid out of pocket for tools and brought in a second dev a few times to help with tedious work so I could focus on core functionality. I spent money while they spent zero, so I could, now in hindsight, make their dreams come true.
The non-technical founder, who called it their “baby,” legit contributed no money. They didn’t want to earn income due to low-income housing restrictions… They wouldn’t even set up a Google Workspace account for a proper email. There was no business plan, pricing model, Stripe setup, or legal entity. Just a 30-ish person waitlist from a year-old landing page form and vague claims like “some people said they’d use it.” However, before a company was formed or a product was launched, they somehow sponsored a fundraiser and the logo of the “company” was put on the event’s marketing materials.
Despite all this, I stayed committed. Even though they initially said 50/50 would work, I realized it probably wouldn’t work out in the long run and that I’d end up taking on more than 50% of the work for the company. I told them they should get more equity because I might not stay forever, but I wouldn’t leave them in the lurch. I’d get it launched, help with transition, and do things the right way. I just said, “we’ll come up with something fair.”
When it came time to formalize equity, I got a “final offer”:
– 2% equity with possible reimbursement for expenses later – or 4% equity with no reimbursement and no recognition as a founder
They said anything more would “scare investors,” based on free advice from an accelerator/startup lawyer. I had done all the work, paid for everything, built all of it, and now wasn’t considered a real co-founder even though I did co-founder work because I might leave at some point, but wouldn’t leave them hanging.
There were no deliverables without me. There was no code, no UX, no logic. I hadn’t launched it yet, so I walked away and kept the code and IP (they have never seen a line of code and didn’t have access to my repo).
A few days later, a barista at the cafe I used to work from told me they were building a similar product (so, clearly it was a novel idea…). They and their co-founder already had 200+ signups after having a landing page up for a week, were paying their developer, had Stripe in place, and dozens of internal docs. How was the barista paying for their product to be built, you may ask: by taking a second job as a barista. They made it work.
That moment really drove it home: I had confused generosity with partnership. And that line turned into exploitation. The whole thing has made me hesitant to look for a co-founder for the project I’m currently building.
So here’s my ask:
– Have you dealt with similar founder dynamics? – What would you have done differently to protect yourself if someone had an idea you believed in, but they couldn’t afford to pay for any legal fees? – How do you vet a potential partner? Yes, it’s business, but does it have to be so “hardcore” with everyone? Or was I in a weird situation? Or just dumb? – Is it possible to partner early without formal agreements that feel adversarial?
margarina72•7mo ago
"if someone had an idea you believed in" but didn't have any meaningful contribution to its realisation? Well, if you are going to build everything, why bother partner with them.
- "How do you vet a potential partner?" Test the trust on simple things, do they acknowledge their own error? Do they pay their share (either in sweat or cash)? Do they lie? It doesn't have to be hardcore, but with the wrong people it is.
- "Is it possible to partner early without formal agreements?" Sure, but again, with or without contracts, it all comes down to relationships. Contracts are a fail-safe, in case things goes wrong. Having a contract doesn't mean people will abide by the contract. When things go wrong, a contract is nothing more than a piece of paper that can use in court. Until you go to court and judgement is made people can do a lot of things that have nothing to do with the contract.
That's why the more important thing you need when partnering with someone is a healthy approach to work and a good relationship.
In general it is hard to find a good partner, especially for a first venture, it is easier when you have a network and people you worked with in a client relationship, and then they usually bring more to the table than sweat equity, or pure cash.