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A criminal enterprise run by monkeys

https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/monkeys-thieves-bali-temple-0b63a432
47•mathattack•6mo ago

Comments

impish9208•6mo ago
Gift link: https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/monkeys-thieves-bali-temple-0b...
mathattack•6mo ago
https://archive.is/8q1Z8
duskwuff•6mo ago
Mind that the original article has some videos which aren't archived.
bediger4000•6mo ago
There need to be swift, severe penalties for these generational crime families. They can't speak, all they understand is violence and ransom, so we must "speak" the only language that they also understand.
dennis_jeeves2•6mo ago
Under section 3.5.6.dx of the primate penal code.
m463•6mo ago
As an outraged banana plutocrat, I wholeheartedly agree!
ChosenEnd•6mo ago
Give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you.
refulgentis•6mo ago
Haha based!!
saghm•6mo ago
It's about time we stop supplying them with sources of dietary fiber and force them to cultivate some moral fiber instead.
damontal•6mo ago
Right! You’re talking shit! PLAY A RECORD!
naikrovek•6mo ago
I get that reference. And I applaud it.

“oooOOOhhh, chimpanzee that! Monkey News, ya fff…”

windowsworkstoo•6mo ago
The amount of ideas Karl had that have since come to fruition is quite remarkable
naikrovek•6mo ago
he's no dummy, that's for sure.
OutOfHere•6mo ago
As noted in the comments of the WSJ article, the monkeys have allegedly been trained by their human handlers to engage in this behavior. It is to promote the sales of the local food vendors at all costs. It is a criminal enterprise, but the criminals are still humans.
hatthew•6mo ago
> A photograph taken by one of the thieves themselves.

uh oh

econ•6mo ago
I wonder if they can serve drinks.

Deliver packages?

c22•6mo ago
Sure, why not?

  Monkey helpers are trained to assist with tasks such as:

    Retrieving dropped objects such as cell phones or remote controls
    Opening bottles and inserting straws
    Turning on buttons/switches for remotes, phones, and computers
    Repositioning limbs on a wheelchair after a muscle spasm to prevent sores and other injuries
    Turning pages and scratching itches

https://www.sunrisemedical.com/livequickie/blog/september-20...
quantified•6mo ago
Don't forget how closely related we are. Not as close as to the murderous bastards known as chimpanzees, but close enough.
decimalenough•6mo ago
https://archive.is/GvpNk
decimalenough•6mo ago
I saw the title, got ready to post about my own criminal monkey misadventures, and realized it's the same place (Uluwatu Temple). However, the story underplays an important element: it's actually a triangular syndicate of crime, and humans are very much part of the picture.

First, the monkey steals something of value from a tourist and (the missing bit) they run inside the temple buildings, which are off-limits to tourists.

Second, a friendly temple priest or caretaker (the mentioned "monkey handlers"), who is allowed inside, fences the loot by exchanging it for something a monkey values, like a tasty banana.

Third, the relieved tourist gets their belongings back and generously tips the caretaker.

micah94•6mo ago
Do you think WSJ is doing this deliberately? Leaving out the part about how it's actually humans behind it. I've heard of this a long time ago, but I see this is a new story. Probably a hundred generations of monkeys have learned this behavior and they don't need any training or handling at this point!
llbbdd•6mo ago
It would not surprise me if WSJ leave this out to avoid painting white tourists as victims.
decimalenough•6mo ago
Or brown locals as complicit.
saghm•6mo ago
Ah yes, the infamously woke Wall Street Journal, bastion of leftwing propaganda since time immemorial.
decimalenough•6mo ago
Yup, that seems to pretty much sum up Trump's view of it.

https://www.rawstory.com/trump-wsj-2673800159/

ViktorRay•6mo ago
Seems like an example of “monkey see monkey do”.

Literally!

Young monkeys observe older monkeys doing all this and that’s how the young monkeys learn to do this and it continues across generations.

antonvs•6mo ago
> The criminal enterprise run by monkeys

The US government?

dennis_jeeves2•6mo ago
That would be closer to a banana republic of monkeys, run by monkeys, for the monkeys.
thmryth•6mo ago
I thought it was going to be about Sony, Bethesda, or a credit card company.
Detrytus•6mo ago
Reminds me of my visit on Gibraltar: monkeys jumping on cars, or stealing purses

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