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Ask HN: Having a child before career has taken off

2•lassearpe•1h ago
Dear HN,

I am a soon-to-be dad. I am looking forward to it, and we have prepared as best we can.

However, one thought is nagging me.

I have finished my bachelors degree in computer science, and I am onset to start my master degree in the fall.

However, I have very little job experience. I have decent grades, enjoy studying and have held a TA position. But I have never worked in a CS-related role professionally and do not consider myself a very good "developer".

I am afraid that I will not be able to work as good (or long) as my peers on school, or on side projects and internships; and that, due to my lack of experience, will have future employers turn me down.

I don't know; maybe I am a bit too pessimistic. I am based in Scandinavia for reference.

Anyone with experience having a child, before your career took off? Or similarly, while in school?

Any advice or words upon the matter is appreciated.

Best wishes, Lasse.

Comments

swah•1h ago
I wish I had kids earlier. More than 1.
lassearpe•1h ago
Thanks for the perspective.
codingdave•45m ago
Odds are it won't make a huge difference - everyone has a life to live outside of work. Even if it does cause some career stagnation, any decrease in your career because of having kids is going to be a good thing. Absolutely nobody gets old and then says, "I wish I worked more and spent less time with family."
lassearpe•39m ago
Yeah, that resonates with me.

Value-wise, I would describe myself as more family-oriented than career-oriented.

I guess I am just worrying about finding a decent job along the road, also to provide for said family.

Thanks.

flaburgan•35m ago
I would say that rising a kid is going to teach you many things you would never learn at school, and those social skills can make a difference in job interviews. If you're able to take care of a family then you certainly are a good team player.
lassearpe•29m ago
Thanks, man. That's a good point.

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