Write shorter. Half the words would have worked.

Besides that, it’s embarrassing for me to read, because our spot on describes me.

I have one coping strategy: when I’m taking care of my kid, or it’s a day off work where I’m grumpy because I left my dopamines at the office: I tell myself, I don’t get to enjoy computers all day. Knowing that resets my expectations and I can better enjoy family time.

Took my entire 6 month paternity leave and 3 months of work before I finally “got it”. Still a struggle. But just being not cranky is a gigantic life improvement, my wife says.

On tech-oriented sites like HN, Lobsters, and reddit, readers are going to notice the style, and it will turn them off. Generally, people on HN find it rude to share AI-generated blog posts here.[0]

You can use an LLM to get feedback on your writing, but you should be the one making decisions about the actual words you write, not just blindly delegating the whole job to an LLM.

[0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=45722069

The company has someone who can rely on when a customer needs help (although I never had to be on-call, I am flexible with timezones), and I often can deliver as it is inside my experience. When it does not work out my company has my back and is respectful of family life.

It also helped me take a step back and realize that sometimes I unconsciously stayed at jobs due to the continually changing (typically stressful) environment.

My new job is a start-up, very small team with a pretty run of the mill stack. I expected to come in hot and heavy to get them up to speed in a flurry of shock and awe. There was no pressure, no red tape, no standups or scrum ceremony, I didn’t have hours and hours of meetings every day anymore, just a set of priorities and some rough expectations on timelines. I had no fucking idea what to do. Not because the requirements were bad or the code was difficult or the expectations were unreasonable, but because I had been jumping from one dumpster fire after another for honestly two decades and thus had no idea how to prioritize or manage time outside of an emergency or urgent deadline. I absolutely collapsed and struggled for a few months to really get much done. Fortunately, my boss is an old friend who had been through the same thing and expected my transition to be difficult, not because the new job is hard but because I would need to unlearn so much bad behavior and process my trauma/stress. At the same time, I realized how that constant sense of urgency hamstrung the way I approached problems as an engineer. It was clear I didn’t work “best” under stress, I had merely learned how to survive in that environment. That was my great re-awakening.