Your final question though is maybe worth a challenge. Why can’t both sides be in the wrong? I always find we are quick to make a problem quite polar without accepting the grey mush in between.

In this case, China has similarly also demonstrated its far reaching and abusive capabilities when given the opportunity (my thoughts around belt-and-road, Tibet, Uighurs and its own treatment of its people in its past). Your point on china not being in a war is also one that can be challenged, proxy wars have and continue to be a thing. China has played their part and continue contributing to active conflicts.