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Nothing Ever Happens: Polymarket bot that always buys No on non-sports markets

https://github.com/sterlingcrispin/nothing-ever-happens
180•m-hodges•2h ago•63 comments

The Future of Everything Is Lies, I Guess: Safety

https://aphyr.com/posts/417-the-future-of-everything-is-lies-i-guess-safety
83•aphyr•1h ago•32 comments

Building a CLI for All of Cloudflare

https://blog.cloudflare.com/cf-cli-local-explorer/
103•soheilpro•2h ago•32 comments

Servo is now available on crates.io

https://servo.org/blog/2026/04/13/servo-0.1.0-release/
284•ffin•5h ago•91 comments

Make Tmux Pretty and Usable (2024)

https://hamvocke.com/blog/a-guide-to-customizing-your-tmux-conf/
172•speckx•3h ago•128 comments

Tracking down a 25% Regression on LLVM RISC-V

https://blog.kaving.me/blog/tracking-down-a-25-regression-on-llvm-risc-v/
22•luu•21h ago•5 comments

MEMS Array Chip Can Project Video the Size of a Grain of Sand

https://spectrum.ieee.org/mems-photonics
33•bookofjoe•3h ago•8 comments

All elementary functions from a single binary operator

https://arxiv.org/abs/2603.21852
717•pizza•16h ago•211 comments

Initial mainline video capture and camera support for Rockchip RK3588

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40•mfilion•4h ago•11 comments

Microsoft isn't removing Copilot from Windows 11, it's just renaming it

https://www.neowin.net/opinions/microsoft-isnt-removing-copilot-from-windows-11-its-just-renaming...
173•bundie•4h ago•116 comments

US appeals court declares 158-year-old home distilling ban unconstitutional

https://nypost.com/2026/04/11/us-news/us-appeals-court-declares-158-year-old-home-distilling-ban-...
203•t-3•4h ago•122 comments

Michigan 'digital age' bills pulled after privacy concerns raised

https://www.thecentersquare.com/michigan/article_7ca4e268-4a68-42fb-9042-f9d8604ebd7f.html
146•iamnothere•5h ago•76 comments

The economics of software teams: Why most engineering orgs are flying blind

https://www.viktorcessan.com/the-economics-of-software-teams/
351•kiyanwang•12h ago•205 comments

We May Be Living Through the Most Consequential Hundred Days in Cyber History

https://ringmast4r.substack.com/p/we-may-be-living-through-the-most
132•laurex•2h ago•54 comments

Taking on CUDA with ROCm: 'One Step After Another'

https://www.eetimes.com/taking-on-cuda-with-rocm-one-step-after-another/
237•mindcrime•19h ago•180 comments

DIY Soft Drinks

https://blinry.org/diy-soft-drinks/
630•_Microft•1d ago•184 comments

Bring Back Idiomatic Design (2023)

https://essays.johnloeber.com/p/4-bring-back-idiomatic-design
647•phil294•1d ago•357 comments

Android now stops you sharing your location in photos

https://shkspr.mobi/blog/2026/04/android-now-stops-you-sharing-your-location-in-photos/
262•edent•6h ago•229 comments

Show HN: boringBar – a taskbar-style dock replacement for macOS

https://boringbar.app/
466•a-ve•1d ago•266 comments

The Rational Conclusion of Doomerism Is Violence

https://www.campbellramble.ai/p/the-rational-conclusion
41•thedudeabides5•1h ago•55 comments

Most people can't juggle one ball

https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/jTGbKKGqs5EdyYoRc/most-people-can-t-juggle-one-ball
464•surprisetalk•4d ago•164 comments

Ask HN: What Are You Working On? (April 2026)

295•david927•1d ago•983 comments

Missouri town fires half its city council over data center deal

https://www.politico.com/news/2026/04/13/missouri-city-council-data-center-00867259
64•impish9208•1h ago•61 comments

I gave every train in New York an instrument

https://www.trainjazz.com/
367•joshuawolk•3d ago•70 comments

I ran Gemma 4 as a local model in Codex CLI

https://blog.danielvaughan.com/i-ran-gemma-4-as-a-local-model-in-codex-cli-7fda754dc0d4
199•dvaughan•21h ago•87 comments

A perfectable programming language

https://alok.github.io/lean-pages/perfectable-lean/
191•yuppiemephisto•20h ago•103 comments

We have a 99% email reputation, but Gmail disagrees

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335•em-bee•1d ago•287 comments

Tell HN: Docker pull fails in Spain due to football Cloudflare block

1078•littlecranky67•1d ago•394 comments

Show HN: I built a social media management tool in 3 weeks with Claude and Codex

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161•JanSchu•8h ago•110 comments

Exploiting the most prominent AI agent benchmarks

https://rdi.berkeley.edu/blog/trustworthy-benchmarks-cont/
560•Anon84•1d ago•136 comments
Open in hackernews

Nothing Ever Happens: Polymarket bot that always buys No on non-sports markets

https://github.com/sterlingcrispin/nothing-ever-happens
177•m-hodges•2h ago

Comments

tekno45•1h ago
any stats on your returns so far?
pawelduda•1h ago
Turkey reported high winrate until Thanksgiving
vessenes•1h ago
Falling victim to the classic fallacy. So sad
syncsynchalt•1h ago
We call it a "black turkey event", nobody saw it coming.
m-hodges•1h ago
Not my project, but author said on X:

> Why predict the future when 73.4% of all Polymarkets resolve as No?

https://x.com/sterlingcrispin/status/2043398710013595857

gruez•1h ago
That logic doesn't work because not every bet have even payouts. If there's a market for whether a dice rolls 1 or not, the odds might resolve to "no" 83% of the time, but if it only pays you $1.1 per dollar wagered on "no", you're still losing money.
wormpilled•1h ago
Basically arbitraging human imagination. People love coming up with fantastical concepts because they get attention, but the more exciting a market is, the less likely it is to actually happen. Reality is usually boring.
nemomarx•1h ago
This makes sense to me, but isn't there a risk of increasing the potential payoff high enough that someone is motivated to go out and make the yes side happen?

Consider this bot running on us military outcomes or something.

cryptonym•1h ago
By design it's a game where people with inside knowledge or enough power to bend reality can steal money from people with gambling addiction. Automating your addiction might not be the best move.
nkrisc•53m ago
This is what markets like Polymarket boil down to. Normies can't win. Some will, of course, but that's just chance and there's no way if ensuring it's you.

It's really no different than a casino: if you ever find yourself with more money than you walked in with, cash out and leave.

Best strategy for most people though is to simply not participate and you'll break even.

Bratmon•21m ago
You say that like it's bad thing, but really it's great!

It gives us normies a way to see what the powerful are thinking.

conductr•17m ago
Except, the thing is, a decent portion of the population enjoys throwing money away in casinos. If they feel a similar level of enjoyment/entertainment from this type of market, then it's no different and they're playing for a non-financial purpose that your calculus isn't pricing in. Maybe a stretch but theoretically, if they enjoy it enough, it can serve as a much cheaper alternative to a casino and thus could actually have a positive net return to one's personal finances even while losing.

And, I'm not even contemplating gambling addiction. There's a huge market of people that just go to Vegas once or twice a year and come home thousands of dollars poorer. But they don't need it, they may not gamble outside of Vegas, or nothing that would signal an addiction.

Spooky23•1h ago
You're thinking like an engineer and making the laughable assumption that "prediction markets" are markets. It's totally unregulated with all sorts of grifts and cheats. One of the platforms was promoting a high-return bet against Rory at the Masters yesterday.

You can make money off of all sorts of stuff. You can "sell" the bets, so there's lots of live pump and dump.

We've gone full circle. The bookie with no neck that smelled like onions was more honest than these platforms.

jazzpush2•1h ago
Well, that's why things aren't priced uniformly, isn't it?
suzzer99•59m ago
My general observation is that people tend to underestimate the likelihood of black swan events (covid, financial crisis) even as it's pretty obvious they're happening. And then when they do accept it, they react too far the other way and assume it's never going to end.

I've had success playing the markets in these specific cases. I did fritter away a lot of my gains from the financial crisis thinking I was a genius market timer. But I learned my lesson and didn't waver once I jumped back in after covid.

In both cases I got out before a bulk of the crash and timed the bottom almost to the day. Lucky I know, but I had reasons for both. For the financial crisis it was when Bill Fleckenstein closed his bear fund and put it all in MSFT. For covid it was when it looked like the lockdown was working and NYC hospitals weren't going to completely fall over like Northern Italy or Wuhan.

For any non black-swan scenarios, I assume I'll never get one up on the masters of the universe and just leave everything in blended age-appropriate funds.

I'm very concerned about an AI crash and the future of white collar work in general. But it feels more like a slow death to me than a black swan. So I'm just hedging with bonds and cash and stocks that hopefully don't crash as hard in a recession.

recursivecaveat•29m ago
I would also not want to take even a fair bet against black swan because the day that "S&P500 falls to lowest level since 2016 as Labubus collapse" is the headline is the exact day I least want to lose a big pile of money gambling. If it's the shareholder's money though.... I'm probably getting laid off in that scenario anyways...
chairmansteve•4m ago
I make similar bets. The SAAS "apocalypse" looks like a buying opportunity to me.
throwaway2027•1h ago
Already priced in.
jp57•1h ago
Except that the mere existence of the market with the question posed for people to consider, probably activates the availability heuristic[1], causing people to overestimate the likelihood.

[1] https://philopedia.org/topics/availability-heuristic/

m-hodges•1h ago
The author also noted:

> yes this has to buy below 0.73 long term, the bot has a configurable ceiling set at 0.65 and checks for new markets buying closer to .5

https://x.com/sterlingcrispin/status/2043685362812461436

gruez•1h ago
What happens if you flood the market with a bunch of implausible bets like "sun won't rise tomorrow"? Sure, you might try to filter that out with some sort of "seasoning" period (ie. don't buy new markets), but then that means more time for arbitrageurs to correctly price the market, depriving you of any price advantage you might have had.
baq•1h ago
jane street is always hiring!
Bratmon•19m ago
> What happens if you flood the market with a bunch of implausible bets like "sun won't rise tomorrow"?

Who does "you" refer to in this sentence? Polymarket itself?

I'm pretty sure if Polymarket itself decides it wants to screw you, you're gonna lose no natter what your strategy is.

hoerzu•1h ago
For this question I'm working on https://polygains.com

What other question would you like to be backtested? This one is fairly easy

thatnerd•1h ago
I think we've collectively DDoSed it. I'm getting a 504 timeout.

The author [page](https://github.com/sterlingcrispin) is there on github, but I can't even find his full list of his repos to confirm it's still there (I also get a 504 on that).

nothinkjustai•1h ago
GitHub is down yet again. Guess they forgot to tell their AI “make no mistakes” while vibecoding.
aprilnya•1h ago
I was about to say “first Microsoft service to reach zero 9s of uptime”, but then I realized, it’s Microsoft… GitHub is definitely not the first
thatnerd•48m ago
Back up
thetailrisk•1h ago
What's the data situation like if you wanted to backtest a model like this? Is it easily accessible?
croemer•1h ago
No, data situation is bad, at least for market making - you need to scrape the orderbook yourself to be able to do any realistic backtesting. And even then, it's hard to know whether other bids at the same price are ahead of you or behind you in the queue.
sterlingcrispin•26m ago
this is a good dataset

https://huggingface.co/datasets/SII-WANGZJ/Polymarket_data

"A comprehensive dataset of 1.9 billion trading records from Polymarket, processed into multiple analysis-ready formats. Features cleaned data, unified token perspectives, and user-level transformations — ready for market research, behavioral studies, and quantitative analysis."

tekno45•1h ago
https://x.com/sterlingcrispin/status/2043723823678382254

They admit no returns.

But it does seem like a fun project and nowhere does it say anything about returns or profits so not scammy imo just funny meme backed code

sterlingcrispin•28m ago
Yes exactly.

The bot has zero risk management and I have a strong disclaimer on the github it is essentially a meme.

73% of all polymarkets do resolve to No though.

There's a good dataset on huggingface if you wanted to do some data science

https://huggingface.co/datasets/SII-WANGZJ/Polymarket_data

raincole•18m ago
> 73% of all polymarkets do resolve to No though.

I wonder what it means exactly. Typical Polymarket looks like this:

X happens before May. [Yes][No]

X happens before June. [Yes][No]

X happens before July. [Yes][No]

...

So even if X ended up happens in December, it's still 12.5% Yes and 87.5% No?

hodder•1h ago
Basically, realized vol is lower than implied vol over time. Yes.
swyx•51m ago
also people overpay for skew protection and you can make consistent money selling skews (until that one time it blows up on you)
nzach•1h ago
If this seems interesting for you remember that if you are putting $100 in a 99 to 1 bet you need to win 100 times to get $100 but only need to loose 1 time to loose $100.

And the chance of losing at least once in a 99% sure bet after 100 rounds is around 60%. Even if you reduce to 30 rounds it still is around 30%.

This may seem smart at first glance, but the math doesn't really checks out.

sterlingcrispin•17m ago
In your scenario you're assuming the dice rolls are all independent. If polymarket bets were all pure dice rolls the 60% odds you quoted would be true.

But they aren't independent there are a lot of correlations. Global geopolitics for example.

The way the math works out, 73% of markets resolve to No, If you buy No at 0.73 each time you would break even.

Not financial advice of course

sambaumann•1h ago
Related: https://www.jbecker.dev/research/prediction-market-microstru... (previous discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=46680515)
cordwainersmith•54m ago
The contrarian bet is fun but I wonder how it actually holds up. Prediction markets do tend to overprice dramatic outcomes, so "always bet no" isn't as dumb as it sounds. Would love to see real P&L over a few months, not just the thesis.
traderj0e•52m ago
I've backtested this kind of strategy, and it had a good return (like 100% APR), but then I realized it was cheating by knowing when things are going to resolve. Often times it's not clear. Your return depends a lot on how quickly you can get your money out. I never got around to trying a strat that doesn't know the resolution time, which actually has to be manual cause it takes some judgement to pick things that you expect to resolve soon.

Also requires a lot of volume to be "predictable" obviously, since 1 loss sets you back 10-20 wins. It's surprisingly hard to find reasonable-liquidity markets after all your filtering. Scare quotes around "predictable" because you never know if others will use this strat or a lot of unlikely events will happen due to insiders.

Edit: Another thing, betting on the overdog in sports markets actually looked more appealing because there are plenty of those events with large volume, they're kinda homogenous, you know exactly when they resolve, and they're harder to rig. Just like the author, I was excluding sports at first. I simply never got around to putting real time or money into that.

baq•50m ago
> One loss sets you back 10-20 wins.

didn't look at the numbers, but this one sentence reminds me of selling options for 'passive income' (don't do that)

traderj0e•49m ago
I drew the same analogy. You put up $0.95, a YES gambler only puts $0.05 (ignoring spread); you're "lending" the money in case of a YES. Problem is, leaving the money in longer doesn't seem to mean a higher premium for the YES side.
doctorpangloss•23m ago
Quintessential hustler logic: inability to compare the gains from wins to inevitable losses.
swyx•50m ago
> Heroku Workflow The shell helpers use either an explicit app name argument or HEROKU_APP_NAME.

nice to see heroku still alive...

sterlingcrispin•27m ago
I love heroku, death to vercel
logicallee•43m ago
Disclaimer: I contribute work as a political advisor and don't participate in betting markets as a market participant.

Nevertheless, Polymarket is a very interesting marketplace of sentiments and information, and it can be a very strong leading indicator of huge price movements in "real" markets like the NYSE, in part because it directly measures one factor of sentiment, i.e. whatever the prediction is about. Market sentiment determines market prices on very large and deep markets, too.

In the run-up to the election, when Trump was running against Biden, a betting market was a leading predictor of NASDAQ (a very deep, very liquid index of stocks). I wrote up the findings here: https://medium.com/@rviragh/does-the-stock-market-react-posi...

This indicator was the best one anyone has ever shown for NASDAQ for any signal, period. The signal was so strong it trumped all other signals and variances of any kind. Traders trading with just this signal and no other signal of any kind could have made practically an unlimited amount of money as long as the signal was intact. (Basically, until Biden dropped out.)

I myself didn't place any bet due to my role as a political advisor at the time, but the size of the correlation is still the biggest and most surprising one I've ever seen.

dheera•27m ago
Honest question: Why in all hell would you open source this?

I have been making money with a bot off a statistical anomaly in prediction markets lately. There is no way in hell I will open source it or tell you what that anomaly is because I have capacity back-tested it and there are so many players in the market; if all of HN and Github start downloading and use my code it WILL cease to work.

Put another way, your orders are helping move the market and price the market more efficiently; that's the market compensating you for pricing things better. If a thousand people run your strategy, prices will get moved to exactly the point where your strategy stops working. You effectively split that pie with a thousand people.

debo_•26m ago
Because they are doing it for fun?
sterlingcrispin•16m ago
for the lulz obviously

you wouldn't get it

unclad5968•9m ago
All strategies get priced in eventually. This is basically the thesis of index funds. It's fine to make money in the interim, but that isn't everyone's goal.
qbane•27m ago
null hypothesis bot
fooker•21m ago
Don’t be gullible enough to fall for this bad math.

Say 70% of the time it resolves to ‘no’, you still don’t make money by blindly choosing ‘no’.

Guess why?

Hint: This strategy is also described with the macabre analogy: picking up pennies in front of a steamroller.

Do you want to pick up pennies in front of a steamroller?

lokar•8m ago
Fall for it? I think it's pretty clear the author is not trying to convince any one of anything. It's mostly a joke.
slg•21m ago
It's interesting that this is explicitly for non-sports markets because I see no reason why this would be less applicable there. Sports betters have long talked about that the winning strategy is usually to bet the under (i.e. the no) on most bets. The over (i.e. the yes) is generally a more exciting and fun outcome which causes it to attract more betters which in turns makes that side overpriced.

Like with this bot, I have no idea if that will still lead to actual positive returns. This might just be a remnant from a time when these betting lines were set less intelligently. But all things being equal, it seems logical that "boring" bets would have a better return in the long run than "exciting" bets as long as some betters are at least partially motivated by entertainment.

There's probably a lot of knowledge like this that sports betters have built up over decades that could apply to these new forms of non-sports gambling.

sterlingcrispin•13m ago
it avoids sports bets because "Who will win game 6 of XYZ" is formatted on the polymarket backend as a Yes/No bet. There's a lot of markets with Yes/No plumbing even though you wouldn't interpret them as such
dheera•6m ago
Strategies like this can easily be positive EV until enough people discover it and that actually is the driving force behind efficient pricing.

There are lots of positive EV strategies lying around in these inefficient markets, the best advice I can give is if you find one, trade the hell out of it and don't open source it or tell anyone about it, because as soon as more people run it, it will cease to be positive EV and then after that it becomes an infrastructure game.

If it's popular on Github it probably doesn't work.

If you found something that works and is paying your rent, don't put it on Github. My 2 cents.

chrisgd•7m ago
Very cool. The opposite of the black swan or turkey corollary. Every day the turkey gets fed and is happy until Thanksgiving rolls around.
modeless•7m ago
Polymarket already has "Nothing Ever Happens" markets where you can bet on a set of events all not happening together. Because why not.
neko_ranger•5m ago
"Nothing ever happens" ETF